An Online Al-Anon Email Meeting
Probably the single most important thing my sponsor said that made sense to me about this Step was that there had to be Acceptance Before Change (ABC=D) with a confident desire to change, I would be able to make the decision asked for in Step Three... that facing the realities of my life and will was acting with courage and confidence.
The first three Steps are known as the acceptance Steps. It is suggested that with honesty (Step One), hope (Step Two), and faith (Step Three), I will be guided to make the changes (thought and action) necessary (Steps 4-12) to live a peaceful, content life whether the alcoholic is still drinking or not.
"Faith" to me is a dictionary definition: trust and confidence. "Will" to me is my thinking; "life" to me is my actions; "care" is love & concern; "God of my understanding" is exactly that and nothing to do with religion but having everything to do with the spiritual concept of this program: My one-on-one relationship with a Higher Power of my understanding, with mankind, and with the world around me.
I am asked in this Step to make a decision to turn my thinking and my actions over in trust and confidence to the Power greater than me I came to understand could help me in Step Two.
In accepting the facts of my life (Step One), looking at the truths and reality of it, I knew I could not do it alone (Step Two). The verdict was that change was necessary and before change could take place there had to be acceptance on my part -- a decision to make humble surrender of my will & my life (Step Three).
When I wanted to get all tangled up in the word "trust" regarding my HP, that lovely sponsor of mine simply said: "Your HP trusts you with no ifs, ands, or buts. What's your problem? You either trust or you don't -- it's your choice. We're not talking about people here - love people, trust your HP."
Rats! She made me so mad! Wouldn't put up with my dancing and playing around with the Steps. I found then that when there is this mutual trust, things go so much easier for me.
A HP who trusts me, I trust - it was a step out in faith - that trust and confidence I needed and I made my decision to make my decision One Day At A Time. Now it is an natural as breathing.
When the Al-Anon book "As We Understood" came out in 1985, I found a story on page 159 that explains how I think about trusting my HP. I climb in his wheelbarrow, one day, one performance at a time.
Geez, HPs with a sense of humor are so neat and I thank mine daily for the people He puts in my life - the many teachers and experiences He has sent my way and the tools provided to think and live my life as He gently guides me.
I really don't have to do this alone by the seat of my pants any more.